This is an interactive strategy to connect with a young person when you are having an individual one-on-one conversation. It especially aims to create curiosity and a connection with you as the worker, but also with the process of the conversation itself.
Video 1: Hold That Thought!
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Hi Peter, Thanks for the video! It feels like there might be some more to explain around this exercise? So they think of 1-3 questions they’d like to ask you, then ‘hold that thought’. What do you then do? Is the intention that you tell them three things about yourself? Or, about why you are here? Or the way you work? I’m about unclear about where the activity goes and why…
Hiya AndyH
Ta for the comment. All work with young people is based in relationship and that’s what this activity tries to build – a meaningful, worthwhile working relationship. And the elements in the activity aim to do just that…there is exchange, there is control for the young person, there is something interesting. And if the young person is reluctant to speak with you, these elements will help lessen that reluctance. Yep, if the young person wants to ask the questions, and they decide if they do or not, then you answer them. Any professional boundary is determined by your response, not by the question. You now have a better chance of being able to raise some of the harder stuff that you might have to look at; and if the young person knows they have some say about this, they can ask things and not just have to listen, that they are not going to be lectured, that they can keep things to themselves if they choose, then you have a better chance of this working. It aint magic and it doesnt work every time, but it can increase the chances of things going well. Building and/or strengthening a relationship is at the centre of all these activities. Hope this adds something. Cheers Pete
This may be a good introductory tool as young people tend not to like answering a barrage of questions about themselves! I see how it balances the power and may put them at ease as it would be different from what they had expected.
Hiya Roconnor
What can I say…think you said it perfectly. Thanks
Yes I like this Peter and as a father can see it being an excellent way to give my kids a chance to think through challenging situations/conversations and retain control “the drivers seat” – will be giving it a whirl shortly.
Yeah Pj69, when I’m not angry and yelling at my own kids and I manage to do what I do with them what I’ve been doing with young people for years ‘at work’…then gee…I find it’s often really successful! Surprise! I like your reference to ‘the driver’s seat’ – kinda makes sense doesn’t it? Let me know how it goes with your kids. Cheers Pete
I really like this activity as young people often feel they are only talked ‘at’ and not part of a conversation. Will definitely be using it when teaching next.
Hiya EmmaE
Totally agree with you…and let me know how it goes with the teaching. Cheers Pete
Cool, simple yet engaging by allowing them to ask questions to you too – thanks peter
And thank you too Mimdesha…
go well. Pete
hi Pete. great start.. love your work as usual, keeping it simple in a complex situation. I like this because it doesn’t matter the context in which you find yourself with the young person/s — this process creates a power shift. in my context I use this in a cultural diversity training for young trainees and so we are looking at cultural exclusion/inclusion.. some of the questions young people want to ask can be (unintentionally) offensive – you don’t know what you don’t know… so… writing them down or ‘holding that thought’ is a good way to get their ‘thoughts’ down, then I work through the learning material and the session, and then if the material/session/discussions have not ‘filled’ their curiosity.. then they still ask their questions and still feel like they have been heard. I like it
Ah Joaiul…you just make it better and better. Thanks for your informed response which adds to this for any viewer. Oh…and me.
Hi, thank you for access to all these great topics but I none of the videos are coming up 🙁 Is the link inactive? apologies if it is an error on my part.